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“Singapore is reported to have the least happy workforce. Do we have the least happy fathers too?”
Mr Richard Seow, chairman of the Fathers Action Network, posed this question in his opening address at the Dads for Life (DFL) CEOs and Leaders’ Luncheon, held at Traders Hotel on 30 May 2011.
He was referring to a Straits Times article published that day, in which a poll of about 4,000 employees in 14 countries found that Singaporeans “least enjoy going to work, are the least loyal and have the least supportive workplaces.” Mr Seow also cited results of the 2009 Fatherhood Public Perception Survey, where work responsibilities was found to be the top challenge faced by fathers who want to spend more time with their children.
The luncheon was attended by about 60 Chief Executive Officers (CEOs) and leaders, including Mr Peter Ong, Head of Civil Service and Guest-of-Honour for the event, and Mr Chan Heng Kee, Permanent Secretary for the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports.
The luncheon opened with a short video presentation and a DFL-commissioned drama skit by The Voice. The 20-minute skit, titled Old Dad, New Dad, depicted the honeymoon period of dating and marriage, as well as the struggles of a father trying to balance his family life and work life.
Mr Seow, in his opening address, commented that the skit was “almost too true.” He also elaborated on the Dads@Workplaces initiative , launched on 27 May 2011. The initiative seeks to make workplaces more father-friendly.
Mr Seow recalled a conversation with a sports editor whose son played badminton in school, but the editor had never been to any of his son’s badminton matches. Mr Seow explained that with sports matches in schools often held on weekday afternoons, it is often difficult for working fathers to attend these matches. Mr Seow suggested that such situations call for creative solutions which will allow fathers to be more involved in their children’s lives.
In his speech, Guest of Honour, Mr Ong, a father of two teenage girls, said that fathers need to balance their roles as breadwinner and parents. With more dual-income families today, both husband and wife must be “full partners in the household,” he said.
Dr Ken Canfield Addresses Working Fathers
The keynote speaker for the event was Dr Ken Canfield, founder and former president of the National Centre for Fathering in the United States (US). He is the author of The Heart of a Father and numerous other books including the award-winning The Seven Secrets of Effective Fathers.
Dr Canfield is currently with the Boone Center for Family at Pepperdine University. He has five children and six grandchildren.
Commending the Dads for Life movement and the efforts to promote active fatherhood in Singapore, he joked, “I know that when Singaporeans identify a problem, it’s ruthless focus,” drawing much laughter from the audience.
He gave suggestions on how organisation leaders can “prepare the future generation’s workforce, [and] more importantly, the family force which forms the base in society.”
How Family-friendly Firms Can Support Employees
According to Dr Canfield, family-friendly firms can create an environment to support employees by:
• providing assessments of individual strengths and weaknesses through regular job reviews
• making family life, marriage and personal relationship education available
• giving access to employee assistance programme (EAP) resources, especially during times of trauma, stress and adjustment
• modelling behaviours which demonstrate commitment, fidelity and integrity through management and ownership
He mentioned how family-held or family-owned firms tend to “see their employees as members of other families.” He cited the example of family-friendly policies in Chick-fil-A, a family-owned business and the second-largest chicken-based fast-food chain in the US. Unlike most fast-food chains, Chick-fil-A is closed on Sundays. Despite operating six days a week, Chick-fil-A is more successful than most fast-food chains which open seven days a week.
Dr Canfield said that employer investment in programmes and services, which are focused on reducing stress, strengthens households and relationships. They result in higher satisfaction scores in life, marriage, parenting and family life. They also result in more positive work-life balance, lower absenteeism and lower healthcare costs.
“Fatherhood sells,” he said. He showed examples of television commercials which depicted how powerful fatherhood is. (Click here to see one of the TV commercials – a McDonald’s advertisement shown in 1992).
“You’re going to have to divert energy and attention [to your child] at a cost, but the benefit in the long run outweighs the cost,” said Dr Canfield.
Mr Cheong Wing Kiat, director at the family-owned Wen Ken Group, agreed that it is important for organisation leaders to set good examples for employees to follow. “I think it should start from the top,” he said.
A father of two boys and a girl, he said that his company treats “employees like our family members.” Every employee’s name card also has the Chinese phrase Yin Shui Si Yuan (饮水思源) which literally means “think of the source when you drink water.”
“We want to share the values of love and gratitude in the company,” he explained. “It is a powerful statement to pull the team together.”
A Story of a Father Serving Overseas in the Military
Dr Canfield closed his speech with a true story of an American father serving overseas with the military. In an essay contest where kids write about their dads, this father was still seen as a “hero” despite being away from the child in a foreign land.
Dr Canfield asked the solider, Jason, to describe his relationship with his daughter, Emily. Jason said that the relationship is “something that has defined me as a man.” “I am a better man because I’m a father,” he said. Jason, who wrote letters to Emily from his military base, added that his relationship with Emily brought a “mixture of love and discipline.”
The soldier told Dr Canfield his message for other fathers: “As much as possible, tell them to be there for their kids as much as they can.” “Take no time for granted with your child. Time is precious,” he said.
Related articles:
- Dads for Life Conference 2011
- Dr Ken Canfield Observes that Dads in Asia are Committed to Family Life
- Dr Ken Canfield: Being Dad is One of the Most Important Jobs You’ll Ever Have
About the Author: The Dads for Life Resource Team comprises local content writers and experts, including psychologists, counsellors, educators and social service professionals, dedicated to developing useful resources for dads.
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