Ask Zheng Ge Ping what’s the most challenging thing about fatherhood and he pauses to think for a moment before stating firmly, “the responsibility.”

“Since you brought your kids into this world, it’s your duty to love them, and your duty to teach them the good and the bad well.”

The veteran actor is a familiar household name, having been active in the acting arena for almost 23 years now.  But strip everything away and you’ll find a typical family man; a father who has hopes and expectations for his children, the same aspirations that every parent has.

Growing up, Ge Ping was a guy who never really thought of settling down early or even starting a family. “It was only when I reached about 24 that I started working with kids in some projects. I found them very cute and quite fun to play with!” said the 45-year-old.

After meeting fellow actress Hong Hui Fang, things progressed naturally from there and the two registered their marriage in 1992.

Of course, he recognised that raising a child was more than just child’s play, and so, deciding to have children was something Ge Ping mentally prepared himself for. “A so-called investment in cars and houses can be sold away easily, but for kids it’s forever,” he said wisely. “When you’re mentally ready to have kids, you’ll definitely treasure them more.”

That certainly holds true for Ge Ping, who has two children, daughter Tay Ying, and son Calvert.
While he adores both kids, Ge Ping admits a “soft spot” for girls.

“I don’t think I’ve ever canned my daughter before,” he said. “I melt whenever I see her cry.”
His 14-year-old daughter still receives flowers every Valentine’s Day from her doting father, who wanted to be the “first man” to give her flowers.

While Tay Ying is daddy’s little girl, that partiality was evened out with the birth of his son, now 10, whom Ge Ping describes as a “very adorable and cute guy.”

Fortunately for the couple, the children are well behaved most of the time.

However when it is necessary for discipline to be enforced, Ge Ping and his wife follow a good cop-bad cop routine. “When I’m playing the bad guy, she plays the good guy,” he explained. “Our roles are interchangeable. You cannot have both of us attacking them at the same time. But most of the time, I’m the good guy,” laughs Ge Ping.

While many fathers find it hard to communicate with their children, Ge Ping deals with the generation gap by keeping up with the times.

“Learn from your kids,” he emphasised.  Discovering the meaning of the term “lol”, a common abbreviation meaning laugh out loud, was one such thing Ge Ping picked up from his kids.

“It’s a different world now,” he said. “The kids have been exposed to the internet and television. If we don’t learn from them, we won’t be able to communicate and a third party will come in. The kids will say that their friends can understand them better than I can.”

So how should fathers go about in engaging their kids? Ge Ping’s advice to that is to “date your children”. He finds that taking them out individually for shopping or a movie can help his kids “open up” to him.

“Your kids tend to share things with you during that time,” he explained. “It’s a different feeling compared to going out with the whole family.”

Of course, with both parents working under a hectic schedule, the luxury of time does not always come by so easily.

Ge Ping recalled a time when both he and his wife were heavily involved in period dramas and other projects.  Leaving the house early and coming home late, they hardly saw their then two-and-a-half year old daughter.

After learning from the maid that their daughter kept throwing her toys outside, the curious couple decided to sneak a peek when they arrived home early one day. What they saw hit them hard.
“She was throwing her toys outside, asking the cat to play with her! We felt very, very sad seeing that”, said Ge Ping of the heartbreaking scene. “After that incident, we made up our mind to spend more time with her no matter what.”

Now, the morning is a special time for Ge Ping, who bonds with his children over a car ride to school. “It’s been many years now and I treasure this time that I have with them very much,” he said.

“No matter what time I sleep, even if it’s at 7am, I’ll make sure I wake up to fetch them to school. I know that if I come home late, they’ll be asleep by then.”

It is obvious that Ge Ping is a devoted father and like any other parent, all he wants is for his children to have greater prospects in future.

“I believe in exposing them to many aspects of life,” he said. “”Not only do they have to learn the right and wrong way of doing things, but also how to be independent. Hopefully they’ll grow up to have a good job, and then the rest is up to them.”

 

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About the Author: The DadsforLife Resource Team comprises local content writers and experts, including psychologists, counsellors, educators and social service professionals, dedicated to developing useful resources for dads.

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